Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Random old story resolved

I played tennis for the first time since JoAnna and I got married this President's Day. I should have started with someone who didn't play #2 singles in college. Today is Wednesday and "the sore" is reaching its peak. Good news -- even though I lost 6-3, 6-4, he's as sore as me.
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Today was the court date. I don't think I posted the story but many have heard me tell it...I really like telling stories. I awoke at 5:00am to drive 20-ish miles in an hour and a half (curse you Hawaii and all your beauty, making everyone want to live here, and therefore making traffic ridiculous) for my court hearing regarding a New Year's Day traffic stop, where I "failed to have current proof of insurance" on federal property (a stone's throw from my house). So, I received a summons to appear in FEDERAL court, or have a warrant for my arrest. Even after (or maybe because?) I went home, retrieved the proof of insurance (which was dated 12-26, that right, five days later), and went to talk to the Military Police who pulled me over at the DUI checkpoint.

This was all because my tail lights and brake lights had shorted out on my way home (presumably) that night. "Why do you have two tail lights out?" the MP asked, surely thinking I knew the answer. So, the tail lights needed to be fixed...after trying a bunch of things I jammed some cardboard in there to solve the shorting problem. This worked like a charm until the safety check needed to be performed on the car. I removed the cardboard, because surely this wasn't going to pass, and hoped for the best. "Well, the lights worked for a second and then the whole back end went dark, but I'm going to pass it anyway." the mechanic says.

Uh, Ok...thanks?

So, back to the court date. I show up early 7:30 for 8:30 court and wait. There were about ten of us waiting...just us alone in the room, no baliff, no lawyers, no judge, nothing.

I've never been in a courtroom before...ominous.

Then the perky legal assistant comes in and says, come up and check in and if you have a minor offense we can discuss that. I show her my summons, ticket, license, and P of I (as I've just now decided to call it) and she looks at all these pieces of my information and then at me and says, simply, "dismissed." WHAT! Three double takes later, I get the impression that she is done with me and that I should leave, go away, be gone, get outta there. Didn't even get to "approach the bench."

Oh yeah, then I went to Saturn (eww) and tried to get the lights fixed. One hour and $0.00 later, everything is tip-top. Making the correction - Saturn (yea!)

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